Begin the Year with Knowing How to Love Yourself

The original video is in Mandarin, see 【人文講堂】親愛的自己 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SuqLWqLdpC0  Loving Yourself Is Not Selfish. Loving yourself is the first lesson in love.

The key lessons translated into English is shown below:

[Humanities Lecture] Dear Self - Living in the Moment with Xu Xiaoxi, Expanding Your Comfort Zone, and Becoming a Confident, Self-Loving Person

Key Insights:

• "All troubles stem from interpersonal relationships; don't care about others' opinions—take responsibility for your own life."
  — Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler

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Lessons from Life's Ups and Downs: Learning to Love Yourself

1. Stop Pleasing Others—Don’t Care About What Others Say

   • It's impossible to please everyone.
   • Affirmation: I am important. My feelings matter. My life is my responsibility.

2. Take Responsibility for Your Own Life

   • Be clear about your choices, their reasons, and your goals—whether you stay or leave, it’s your freedom.
   • Who I am today is 90% due to myself. (See S Covey 10-90 Principle)

3. Learn to Be Alone: Solitude Is a Form of Freedom

   • Find joy in spending time with yourself.

4. The Only Way to Overcome Fear Is to Face It

5. Declutter Your Life + Live in the Moment

   • Let go of attachments to people, things, or ideas that don’t serve you. Life will change for the better.
   • Keep what nourishes your life, elevates your mind, and enriches your experiences.
   • Practice letting go: Release past hurts, mistakes, and missed opportunities—they no longer exist. Let go of anxieties about the future.

6. Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

   • Try new things and discover your limitless potential.
   • Why not? What you once thought you couldn’t do, you may realize you can.
   • Become an interesting and confident person.

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Key Takeaway:

Loving Yourself Is Not Selfish.
Loving yourself is the first lesson in love.

Wishing you all a good and happy 2025.

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【人文講堂】親愛的自己 - 跟徐曉晰一起活在當下、擴大舒適圈，做一個有自信愛自己的人 -
所有烦恼都是人際關係的； 不在意他人看法 人生要自己承担 - 奥地利心理學家阿德勒

經歷人生波折，才學會如何愛自己

1 不要管别人说什么 ， 停止讨好别人 - 我们有多不可能去讨好每一個人；
我是重要的。我的感受是重要的。我的人生是我来承的。

2 要自己為自己的人生負责 - 清楚选择的原因舆目的 不论去留都是自由
我成為今天的我 九成原因在自己 10-90 Principle

3 學习獨处：獨處是一個人的自由 - 享受和自己相處的快樂

4 消除恐懼的唯一辦法就是面對

5 生活斷捨離+活在當下
捨去去執著自的人事物 人生自會大不相同
留下什腐呢：可以滋養你生命的 可以提升你的思想的 可以豊富你生活的
要放手, 要活在當下. 放掉过去的伤,错误,错过,因為过去已經不存在了. 放掉对未來的担忧.

6 走出舒適圈：嘗試新事物，發掘自己無限可能 Why NOT. 本来以为我不行,但发觉我可以.
成为有趣而且自信的人

愛自己不是自私 爱自己是愛的第一課