Truths of Life & How to Live It Well - Combining Two 20-Truths Lists

I found two lists of "20 Truths of Life". Combining them into a shorter list will help memory and understanding. I also improved some of them. I hope it is a good list for your reflection in life, especially for the annual New Year resolutions.

The Sources:
https://www.inc.com/matthew-jones/20-brutal-truths-about-life-no-one-wants-to-admit.html By Matthew Jones

http://hackspirit.com/20-brutal-truths-life-will-make-better-person-1/ See 20 Truths of Life & You Must Choose the Right Response

The Combined List Summary:

1. Life is Short - Live Wisely
2. Develop Yourself 1st -Then can you help others
3. Self-awareness - Be & Manage Yourself
4. Write Your Life Story - Only You can do it
5. Life is about Relationships - Use Your time to build them
6. Happiness comes from Good Relationships - Acceptance of Self & Others bring satisfaction

The Expanded List:

The truth numbers are kept from the original lists so that you can check them up if needed.
Yellow truth is from Hackspirit and Green truths are from Matthew Jones.



The Details:

1 Life is Short - Live Wisely

• 1) We haven’t got that much control in life.We can only control our response. Habit#1 Be Proactive
• - 1. You're going to die and you have no idea when.Start structuring your life in a more meaningful way.
  
  • 11) Everyone will die.So, what should I be doing?
• 20. Time is your most valuable asset--you need to prioritize how you spend it.You can't manage time but can choose wisely how to spend your time.
• - 0 Know Your life purpose, the right values and develop the right character.
  • 12) You give your own life meaning.A car does not know its purpose. Ask the right source, your Creator who created you. He should know.
• 14) Life isn’t that serious.Find your answer in Point 12 and enjoy living our your purpose.
• 15) Everything will come to an end.Enjoy while it lasts and prepares for the next stage.

2 Develop Yourself 1st - Then can you help others

• • 15. Investing in yourself isn't selfish. It's the most worthwhile thing you can do.Confucius: Build yourself up first that you may help others. 己欲立而立人
  • 11. Your talent means nothing without consistent effort and practice.Develop them and put them to use.
  • 19. Your ambition means nothing without executionIt's time to get going
  • 18. Pleasure is temporary and fleeting, so stop chasing fireworks and start building a constellation.Don't settle for an ego boost right now when you can delay to experience deeper fulfillment.
  • 18) Make a change or don’t complain.Unless you can find a better way.
  • 5) The best lessons often come from hardships = 19)Challenges develop you.
  • 6) We often confuse being busy with being productive.Prioritize the Important over urgent. Habit#3 1st Thing 1st
  • 4) Worrying is a complete waste of time.Face up the worries. How likely and Even if it happens, so...

3 Self-awareness - Be & Manage Yourself

• • 8. Your thoughts are less important than your feelings and your feelings need acknowledgment.Examine your feelings first and then think through to know and accept yourself better.
  • 6. You can't make everyone happy, and if you try, you'll lose yourself.Start respecting your values, principles, and autonomy.
  • 3) Everything, even you, is imperfect. & 17) Be realisticAccept it. Develop your talents and outsource your weaknesses
  • 7. You can't be perfect, and holding yourself to unrealistic standards creates suffering.Fight back against that negative voice, develop your strengths, outsource your weaknesses
  • 9. Your actions speak louder than your words, so you need to hold yourself accountable.Be responsible and take actions that increase positivity and love.
    Listen to criticisms carefully. Learn from it and make improvements
  • 2) Our expectations are what causes are sufferinglet go and simply enjoy life for what it is. But, make it better for yourself and others.

4 Write Your Life Story - Only You can do it

• • 13. Nobody cares how difficult your life is, and you are the author of your life's story.Stop looking for sympathy and start to create your desired life story.
  • 16. It's not what happens, it's how you react that matters.7-Habit#1 Response positively to achieve a better outcome.
  • 12. Now is the only time that matters, the past is gone, the future is yet to be. (modified from original post)Learn from the past, enjoy and prepare for the future- see #13
  • 10) It’s easier to hold onto the way things are than to learn and grow.Embrace change and grow up.

5 Life is about Relationships - Use Your time to build them

• • 17. No man is an island. Life is about meaningful relationships.You need to improve your relationships to have lasting happiness.
  • 10. Your achievements and successes won't matter on your death bed.Relationships matter more so start to act accordingly
  • 2. Everyone you love is going to die, and you don't know when. re-establish meaningful relationships with important people in your life
  • 5. Donating money does less than donating time.Giving your time creates a memory for yourself and others that last
  • 14. Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, (replace original post)And those who love it will eat its fruit. --- Make sure our speech gives life
  • 13) There is no such thing as a perfect partner.Open your eyes wide to choose the right one. Then close the eye of criticism and appreciate the one you have chosen. She is the right one for you.

6 Happiness comes from Good Relationships - Acceptance of Self & Others bring satisfaction

• • 3. Your material wealth won't make you a better or happier person.money only amplifies that which was already present.
  • 7) Most of us don’t need more to be happy, we need less. = 20)Happy for a while only. There are things more important than wealth.
  • 4. Your obsession with finding happiness is what prevents its attainment.Happiness is always present --it's just a matter of connecting to it
  • 9) Most arguments we have are pointless.Put ego aside and think what you can learn from the arguments.
  • 8) As a society, we’re way too focused on outer beauty.Do both, internal virtues and external grace.

Lim Liat (c) 24-8-17

What do you think of PM Lee's National Day Rally Speech 2017?

I post this topic at first on Facebook and received some comments. I am posting it here to see whether Blogging is still a popular media. Here are my thoughts on his speech.

What do you think of the PM's Speech? 

Some feel, using their word, "Forgettable". They wanted him to address the pressing issues such as MRT breakdowns, foreign policies, and relationships, etc. But if those are being addressed already, there is no point mentioning them to stir-up more attentions. 

In Chinese strategies, we learn about 避实击虚 avoid the strength and attack the weakness，避重就轻 avoid the heavy and handle the light. Even Jesus uses parables when He addressed the crowd. GuiGuZi tells us to address the heart, gain the listening ears first before selling your reasons. Grace must come before truth.

The 3 issues he mentioned are actually the long term and important issues. The 7 Habits Habit 3 First thing First teaches us to address the important issues now before they become urgent where we don't have the time for a right solution (e.g. MRT breakdowns come from many years of neglect on maintenance for chasing after profits). I only have one issue that he did not address, i.e. the increasingly high costs of living and doing business in Singapore. But may be he did subtlely in the SmartNation project.

1. Pre-School issue addressed two key problems - declining birth rates and qualities of the future workforce and hence of wealth in the future.
2. Diabetes issues address the health of the people. Most people are aware of cancer and heart problems, but as he said, diabetes is important but neglected and hence he must bring it up to get people's attention.
3. The smart nation issue is about addressing the work force skills and productivity issues of organizations, private and public. We must make use of technology to increase productivity and create jobs. The long term solution for us is to better skilled and organized for better productivity. Using technology to extend our brain and body to compete better especially we cannot rely on labor only but on value-adding. The richer we get, the more productive and value-adding we need to do.
   （See https://venturebeat.com/2017/09/07/automation-replaced-800000-workers-then-created-3-5-million-new-jobs/)

They are long terms issues that must be addressed now when there is some time to put them right. Once we got the message and internalize them then may be we can happily forget them because we are already doing them.

Some friend commented:

•  "But a National day rally is like a "motivational" speech for what to look forward to rather than being health consultant/ techie consultant? Child care issues have been around for so many years. Many say it's way long over due by at least 1.5 decades."
• But I agree with you on increasing cost of living and cost of doing business here. A few of my friends already shut down shop/business to venture overseas...

My Response:

• It was a motivational speech to encourage you to take care of your health by more check-ups, more exercises, and less sugar. Go ahead to have more babies and not worry about their education, the govt will take care for you. Learn hi-tech and use hi-tech in your business. 
• He put money to support the programs and not just empty talk. How many politicians talk without money or commitments.
• To address an issue late is better than not addressing it. Besides adding facilities, he is upgrading the teachers' skills. Essentially, he is asking MOE to address education from pre-school rather than from Pri 1.
• He has been held accountable now to those 3 programs and next year they have to report progress.
• On High Cost of Doing Business in Singapore:
• In a way, when we need to go overseas to start businesses, it may mean that the value-add that we are creating cannot exceed the local high costs. Companies like Apple, Facebook etc do not have to go overseas because their value-add is so much higher than the high salaries and the great environment that the talents they employed.
• Nationally speaking, high costs actually pushes out the low-value adding industries. It looks cruel in the short run but if we can make it, our people will be wealthy. So the govt is trying very hard to help all kinds of SMEs. We may disagree with their specifics, but that is their programs.

Lim Liat (c) 23 Aug 2017

Related:

Almost half of Singaporeans neutral on PM Lee’s National Day Rally speech: poll