How to Know a Person Better - Gui Gu Zi's Wisdom#10 C8 8 摩篇 Probe

An important element of the appreciation of situation for planning is to know the personality, the likes, and dislikes of the key people involved. This is done through Probing 摩. Here are the techniques and principles.

To Know a Person is to know His Intentions & Motivations
How can we know a person well? What is there to know about a person? The key is to know his character or personality, his abilities, weaknesses, values, and when wanting to work together, then his intentions for the project. Such intentions can be discovered through observation and probing. Gui Gu Zi tells us that the inside will be revealed eternally when we probe wisely. It is a process of making friends, observing, probing lightly and then deeply. Eventually, the hidden intentions can be known.

The Best Kind of Leaders is Invisible and Traceless
Taking the oppositive viewpoint then, the top class leaders should not draw attention to themselves but be invisible in their leading. Such a concept is taught by Lao Zi in Levels of Leadership - Can We Measure Leadership? The best leaders are not known by the people. The people all taught they have achieved successes by themselves. "The king's army wins daily by not having to fight nor spend any resources and so the people do not know what to obey or what to fear, and the world is like heaven.", said Gui Gu Zi. See How to Win without a Fight? The Wisdom of Sun Zi & Gui Gu Zi. A key ingredient for winning is knowing the intentions and desires of the key players. Here is the method.

Probe According to the Personality Types and Desires

1.  The Peaceful/Steady will be calm, still, and quiet. They don't like changes.
2.  The Righteous will be just and doing the right things. Is it wrongful?
3.  The Happy will be joyful. What pleasures and funs?
4.  The Angry will be excited with a lot of movements. Why not now?
5.  The Honorable will want to get more famous.
6.  The Doer will want to accomplish more things. What needs to be done?
7.  The Honest will want to stay clean and is against corruption.
8.  The Trustworthy will be hopeful and optimistic. We can do it.
9.  The Greedy will demand more benefits. Where is the money?
10.  The Insecure will use and want flattery. 

Doing the 3 Key Things Well

1. Planning needs to be complete and details. No small things can be neglected.
2. Persuasion needs a lot of listening and gaining the hearts to gain the agreement and support.
3. Execution must be done right to achieve success.

The Principles of Probing

1. Be like them to gain acceptance and trust so that they are willing to disclose themselves.
2. Appeal to their desires so that they will listen, agree and support you.

Applications 

1.  The Chinese have subjects that can tell a person's character and abilities from their face, palm, and general shapes of the body.
2.  Today, we have the subject of "Body Language". Our inner feelings are expressed unconsciously through our body actions and facial expressions.
3. A customer complains are actually his desire to want to buy your products or service if only you get through to solve their problems. 
4. The Traditional Chinese Medicines(TCM) doctors have long been able to diagnose the sicknesses without the aids of modern technologies like X-ray, MRI, Ultrasound devices.

So, by careful observation, and probing at the right time with the right questions, we can engage a person and slowly get to know him better especially his intentions and motivations for your business ventures. Don't be distracted by initial success but persist to complete the full understanding of a person.

Lim Liat (c) 24 Jan 2018

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