"Please release me and let me go" is a popular song in the 60's. The music and the lyrics must be good to get popular. Many must have liked the lyrics and are persuaded. We learn the following five points of a persuasion: ask instead of push, give reasons, use truth to justify, show the benefits and repeat the proposition tagline.When thing goes wrong or when we can't get something that we like, then we blame others for the failure or the withholding of the good things. It started since the beginning of creation. Satan accused God of withholding the best to Eve. Adam blamed God for giving him Eve that caused him to sin against God. Eve blamed the Serpent for tempting her. On the surface, it sounds reasonable but it does not really help, and the real issue is not faced and resolved. There are really excuses for not taking responsibility and be accountable to one's action.
Nevertheless, blaming and passing the bugs remain one of the key technique to defend or get one's wishes fulfilled. We can learn them from the famous pop song "Please releases me and let me go". We must be aware and know how not to be fooled such as persuasion.
The mind-map below give the lyrics and the advice or hidden message.
- Ask instead of push - Soft is better than Hard
- Giving respect and power to the party boosts his ego and give him face. It is better to be soft rather than hard and pushy.
- It also passes the bug to him since he is the one with the power to change the thing.
- It makes him appear as the big bully and us as the victims that we can get sympathy support.
- Give reasons - Examine the Foundation of the Reasons to Remove Mere Excuses
- Without any reason, one will be judged to be unreasonable.
- The key to discern the right or wrong is to examine the reasons given.
- The reason here given is "I don't love you anymore".
- If you buy his reasons, then you have to agree to his appeal.
- 'Lack of Love' is a common excuse for divorce. We need to examine the meaning of love. Most think love is a feeling. But true love is a commitment and of the will rather than just feeling. In old days, marriages are arranged by parents. Love comes after the marriage.
- The reasons or excuses given are the key parts of discernment. Examine them carefully to differentiate true reasons and mere excuses of passing the blame.
- Use truth or Generality Accepted Principles to Justify - Watch out for Using Ends to Justify the Wrong Means.
- Watch out for this. The spin has been done earlier in the excuses given. Once you buy this, this is used to the utmost justification. Most people use a good cause, the desirable and worthy ends to justify the wrongful means.
- Show the benefits to the Approver.
- This is another key point. Why should you approve if it is only good for me? There must be benefits to the one granting the approval.
- Summarize and Repeat the Proposition Tagline.
- Need to bring all the points given to a conclusion. Best is to have a tagline.
- "Release me and let me love again" is a good one.
- A better one might be, "Release me and let us all be free again".
So, when you need to make a presentation or give an approval, please follow this that you can get your proposal approved or not be fooled by carefully disguised proposals.
Lim Liat (c) 18 Oct 2013